What I've Learned From My Dog

We have only had Millie for four months, but she has taught me so much.

Millie is my first dog. I grew up with golden retrievers, but was never responsible for their daily care. I can't imagine this family without Millie.

Millie has showed me the importance of napping. Who doesn't benefit from a nap?

Fetch is ok, but playing with your toy without someone throwing it 20 feet away each time is better.

Surely there are all the lessons on unconditional love and forgiveness,  but the best lesson is: You don't need to see where you are going to enjoy the ride.

102/366: Thinking about...

: : how nice and quiet it is in my house today

: : a new design for the Crochet Along since the original layout isn't making me overjoyed and realizing that I am not a pattern follower, nor recipe follower.

: : a soon to change life where my day won't be spent entirely at this computer

: : the spring air and how it's about to make my nose and eyes and ears revolt, but not quite yet

: : how much I love my husband and kids

: : a hot cup of coffee

: : the movie I saw last night and how the boy reminded me so much of my Big Boy and how that scared me to tears

: : a date night? perhaps?

: : how I write here hoping others enjoy what I write, knowing that only a handful will ever see this, but understanding that I am writing for myself, my journal of life.

Remember the Shift?

Little Man and I made Gluten Free Chocolate Chip - Chia Seed - Banana Bread on Wednesday night.  It was pretty good, but came out a tad dense.  I think that was from the Almond meal I used.  Only used a 1/4 cup, but that stuff is heavy!  I'll keep tweaking it to get it where I'm happy, then I promise myself, I'll follow the recipe.

Anyone else change recipes a bit for spite?  I really can't think of any reason why I can't follow a recipe.  I just like to make it my own.  I'm a rebel like that.  Walking on the wild side.

So, the shift.

I told you I felt a shift coming on.  I wasn't really sure if it was the fighting in Africa (did you know the Ivory Coast is also fighting?  Their incumbent won't step down for the newly elected president) or something else.

It may be Africa, but it is also something else.  If you recall at the end of February my mom drove me to the hospital with chest pains.  My heart turned out just fine.  My doctor wanted me to get a scan of my gallbladder.  I really thought he was wacky.

Laying on the table at the imaging place, the tech confirmed my doctor's suspicion.  Gall Stones.  Lots of them.

Big ones and Little ones.  Old ones and New ones.  Red Fish Blue Fish.

I have now read that gall bladder attacks can mimic a heart attack.  The technician believes that I knocked a stone loose when I was shoveling.  And that is the concern, that a stone will get stuck in a duct (trying to keep it clean, here!).

My mom had her gall bladder removed, so it wasn't a shock that I had issues.  I was actually fine with it.

Until this morning.

I was just getting out of a meditation to try and soothe my neck pain/stress when I got the call.  The nurse at my doctor's office wants me to call the surgeon to schedule "easy little surgery".

I completely lost it.  I now know that it was the piling up of Little Man in the hospital, me in the hospital, Big Boy in the hospital, Little Man with pneumonia, me with the gall bladder: all mixed with a continuing stress of work and money and job and Tom's schoolwork.  It was all just too much.

And like every time I "lose" it, I come back feeling stronger.  Well, maybe that's pushing it, I still feel like crap, but Tom helped put things in perspective.  He has a way with that.

The other thing that is helping...or shall I say saving?  Tomorrow is a day away with the girls.

Great timing!

Connecting With My Past

My mom had this bracelet made for me.  They are spoon handles from my Great Grandmother's silver setting.  I love wearing it and remembering my grandparents with every clink of the bracelet. 

I've been feeling a shift lately.  Shifting of my outlook on life, my curiosity in the after-life and past-lives, and even my reevaluations of my core belief systems.  I feel like something big is happening.  Many talk of 2012 as the end of the world, or major changes.  I believe that shift has already begun with the unrest in Egypt, Tunisia, the earthquake and tsunami in Japan, now Libya and all the other countries where the people are fighting for their own personal freedom.  It's a snowball going down a mountain, gathering snow and people and becoming a boulder that can't go unnoticed.

The changes are having me take a step back to remember who I am, explore who I will be and even who I was in other times.  Do past lives really exist?  I'm almost over the fence, but still not quite sure I buy the "I was a princess in a past life" or the "I used to be a chemist". 

I'm not sure what's going on, but surely it's something.

Turkeys

There were twelve varieties of turkeys at this farm. Twelve...who knew?

I like the chocolate colored ones the best.

And then it got interesting.

See the sign? Thanksgiving Turkeys.

Yes, the question came up.

"Do they kill these?"

Here is how the conversation went with Sam, my 7 year old:

Sam: "So, uh, do they, uh, just shoot them with a BB gun and put them in the oven?"

Me: "Well, no."

Sam: (wheels turning in the brain)

Me: "You can't shoot with a BB gun because then there would be bullets in the turkey that you are trying to eat."

Sam: (wheels turning faster, clearly looking for an honest answer)

Me: "Well, the farmer takes a BIG cleaver, a really sharp thick knife, and CHOPS the neck of the turkey. Then they pluck all the feathers from the bird and clean out the organs and put them in a little bag, stuff them back in the turkey and then sell it to customers. Then we buy the turkey from the farmer and we stuff it with bread and onions and celery and other yummy things, shove it in the oven for many hours, then eat!"

And because I'm the mom and I know my son...

Sam: "Oh, cool"

and went back jumping off the haystacks.